Fake It 'til You Make It, Then Keep Faking It?

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There is no denying that we live in a society that sends out a very confusing message regarding body image. The media is constantly full of images of celebrity skinny minnies, there are always TV shows telling you how to make yourself look more attractive, there are magazines that name and shame celebrities for daring to have a hair out of place and we also have programmes dedicated to getting people to lose weight. Yet at the same time we also keep being told that we should accept our bodies and make the best of what we've got. 

There is nothing wrong with telling people to accept themselves as they are, but it's not that easy. Especially when most of the images we see each day are of slim, trim celebrities, and it's easy to forget that the people we see in the media will usually be on strict diets, have personal fitness trainers helping them to work out for hours every day, and even then they will still have their photos touched up in Photoshop. A lot of us know this, but we still strive to look different.

[An] 80-page report was drawn up by MPs and Central YMCA, the world's biggest young people's charity, after a three-month public inquiry during which hundreds of witnesses made submissions.

It concludes that a toxic combination of the media, advertising and celebrity culture account for almost three-quarters of the influence on body image in society, yet the "body ideal" typically presented was estimated to be not physically achievable by nearly 95% of the population. - The Guardian

Personally, I don't think that it's just the media, advertising and celebrity culture that makes us want to change how we look. I think that some people have always been insecure and that way back before we even had the media people would still have looked at each other and wished they were larger or smaller, or had red hair rather than brown. The Egyptians were the first to cultivate fashion, so it's nothing new to want to change your appearance.

Many people seem to be shocked that this isn't just a girl's issue either.

The issue is no longer determined by gender, with body image now a major concern for boys and men as well as girls and women, the report concludes. Half of girls and a third of boys aged 14 have been on a diet to change their body shape, the document said, with youngsters exhibiting their parents' own anxieties. - The Guardian

This doesn't surprise me at all. Just because we are different sexes doesn't mean that boys and men don't also feel insecure. Men are also presented with unobtainable images in the media that they are encouraged to aspire to.

Katy Perry before and after Rolling Stone cover

We are being told that we must tell children that the images they see aren't real. That they've been fixed in Photoshop, and I think that's great. But I also think we also need to push for Photoshop to be used less, or at the very least for altered images to have a small symbol or tag line indicating that it has been Photoshopped.

I also wish that as a society we would stop rewarding people for just being attractive. We are always featuring these 'beautiful people' in the media, we have TV Shows dedicated to showing you how to make yourself look beautiful. I know that it is unrealistic, but I do wish that we could instead celebrate people for what they really are. I especially wish that we would celebrate people for their talents and their intelligence, not how they look.

A while back AA Gill criticised classical historian Mary Beard for being 'too ugly for TV' and he has also criticised Clare Balding and even in his 'apology' he said:

Some time ago, I made a cheap and frankly unnecessary joke about Clare Balding looking like a big lesbian. And afterwards somebody tugged my sleeve to point out that she is a big lesbian, and I felt foolish and guilty. So I’d like to take this opportunity to apologise. Sorry.

Now back to the dyke on a bike, puffing up the nooks and crannies at the bottom end of the nation. - The F Word

Shocking, and sadly, AA Gill won't be the only one who thinks along these lines, there are a great many people who think that it is okay to comment on how another person looks and that it's okay to make fun of someone for their appearance or sexuality. It isn't.

What makes me particularly annoyed about these examples is that he was criticising two very intelligent and talented women about how they look, not their actual work. Why does their appearance even matter? How often do we hear the same sort of comments regarding men? I can't think of any examples.

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As a society we need to stop valuing looks over substance. It shouldn't matter what the person on your TV screen looks like. What should matter is whether they are doing a good job. Mary Beard, for example, is an amazing historian and her TV programme is fantastic and incredibly informative. That is the most important thing. I'm not saying we must stop caring about our appearance all together, I'm pretty sure that's impossible. What I am saying is that we should try to find something more important to care about as well.

This isn't just a Western phenomenon either, people across the world seem to have negative body images. In China it's not uncommon for women to stick to very strict diets, and sadly they often dabble in eating disorders, to maintain their figures, because their culture also prizes women who are small and slim, and this isn't necessarily because they have been influenced by our culture.

If we want to change the way our society is going, then we need to stop and have a good hard look at ourselves. We need to adjust our priorities, and teach ourselves and the next generation that you don't have to look perfect. That actually, most people cannot look like they do in the media. Even the celebrities do not really look like their photos.

We need to reward people for being intelligent and talented, not for just having a pretty face.

How To Be Vegetarian Without Alienating Everyone Or Having To Eat Rabbit Food

We're half way through National Vegetarian Week in the UK so here is a bonus update!

I'm guessing you're reading this because you're interested in vegetarianism, possibly considering it or already are a vegetarian, or you're just interested in seeing what I'm going to say. I hope this is helpful!

A little back ground information

I've been vegetarian for about four years. My fiancé has been vegetarian for about three years. I have friends who have been vegetarian for most of their lives, some who have been vegetarian since birth and some who are only recent converts. But I also have lots of friends who are not vegetarian and I am the only vegetarian in my family. I love animals and I don't want to harm something that I love. But I also understand that not everyone feels that way. We all draw the line in a different place.

Becoming A Vegetarian

I'm a big advocate of just doing things, especially when it comes to diet changes. No weaning. No 'one last bacon bap'. Just cut it out right now. I think that weaning yourself off something can just make things harder. I'm not saying don't use up what's in your cupboards, there is no point in throwing away perfectly good food, but personally I would just donate any leftover meaty food to a friend or family member who will eat them. But that's just me. Also, don't worry about not being able to eat anything, you'll be surprised by just how much of what you eat everyday is already vegetarian.

Do Your Research

Most of us know someone who says that they tried being vegetarian and it made them sick. It's much, much more likely that they just didn't do it properly. You can't just cut out a big part of your diet and not expect to feel the effects, and you can't just carry on eating the same things minus the meat. The Vegetarian Society and The Vegan Society are packed with information on how to ensure you're body is getting everything it needs and they also have tons of delicious recipes, so check them out.

It Doesn't Have To Be Hard

Being a vegetarian can feel pretty isolating at times. Like I said, I'm the only vegetarian in my family and I was also the only vegetarian at my old job, so I often had to put up with annoying and sometimes just really stupid questions. The most common being "but how can you live without bacon!?" or people telling me that it's pointless. So join forums. Get on Facebook and join groups. Get on Tumblr and follow people, this is also a great way to find yummy recipe blogs. Read vegan and vegetarian blogs. Read books.  

It can also be hard to be civil with people who have views that are in such contrast to your own, but I've always had the view that if you treat others with respect, then they will do the same to you nine times out of ten. But I'll talk more about this further down the page!

If you live in a small town then it can be difficult to find the foods you want, but don't forget that the internet is packed with online shops so you can always order the more obscure items. You also don't really need a lot of the fancy ingredients some people talk about, you can create simple, cheap and delicious dishes with just the basics!

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Eating out can be hard as a vegetarian, and even harder if you're vegan. Asian restaurants and Italians tend to be pretty good though and don't be afraid to ask. When I was on holiday in Dublin we went to an Indonesian restaurant and they didn't have anything vegan, so I asked the waitress if there was any way they could alter some of the dishes and she asked the chef. The chef created me my own vegan dishes that weren't on the menu and said that he really loved the challenge! So it's always worth asking and if they're rude then just leave and go somewhere else.

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Living With Parents

If you still live at home then it can be difficult to be vegetarian because your parents are still calling the shots. When I first decided to be vegetarian my parents were iffy about it. Eating out was a pain. But over time they've realised that this isn't just a silly phase, that it's important to me. Nowadays when I visit my parents the fridge is packed with veggies, fruit and vegetarian meals for myself and my fiancé, and they have realised that I'm really not fussed if we go somewhere and all I can eat is a salad. My Dad is also really lovely and will ask waitresses questions on my behalf and my Mum will check menus before we go into places. So, if your parents are giving you stick about it now, they'll get used to it. It also helps if you refrain from pushing your beliefs on them, just like you wouldn't want them pushing their beliefs on you.

By Pawel Kuczynski

Don't Alienate Everybody

When you first launch yourself into this new, exciting vegetarian world it's easy to get carried away. You've learnt so much and you want to enlighten other people. But, not everyone appreciates that.

I think that meat looks and smells disgusting. I avoid the meat and fish aisles in the supermarket because the smell actually makes me feel a bit sick. But, I'm not about to point to a friend's bacon sandwich and tell them that the sight and smell of it makes me want to wretch, that's just rude.

It can be hard to keep your mouth shut when people are acting like jerks and it's fine to point out if someone is hurting your feelings. But, when your friend says how it's so horrible that someone would abuse a dog, try to refrain from shrilling "but animals in the meat industry are abused everyday and you EAT them!" or when someone is eating a chicken salad, try to not point at them and say "it's really no different to eating your cat!", it's just not going to win you any friends and very few arguments. Even if what you're saying is completely true, a lot of people just don't want to hear it and it often ends up in arguments where no one wins and everyone gets their feelings hurt.

I'm not saying don't be honest and don't feel like you can't express yourself, of course you can, but try to be a grown up about it. I don't tell people that I'm vegetarian unless they ask or it's relevant, like if I'm going to a party and there will be food. If someone asks me why then I will simply tell them I don't want to eat animals. If they keep pressing me then I might explain further if I feel that we can have a proper conversation about it. 

People are often genuinely interested, and most people don't mean to hurt your feelings or offend you. So next time someone asks you why you choose to not eat anything with a face, explain it like the sane, rational person you are! 

But if someone is waving a steak in your face, then I fully support you smacking it out of their hand. I also fully support activism, whether you're striding about with a placard or just signing petitions, and sharing information with people through blogs, websites and social networking. But again, do it with a little style and please, please don't post horrid images of abused animals. I know that's the last thing I want to see when I log into Facebook and it doesn't really achieve anything, except for upsetting people and making them angry.

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 I've always been a firm believer that it's far easier to win people over if you're calm and explain things, rather than lose your rag and accuse people of being awful for not thinking the way you do. Quite often you just come across as a nut-job, and no one is going to want to agree with the crazy person. Who are you to say that your particular choice is better than anyone else's? None of us are perfect and it's our differences, ability to change and ability to discuss arguments that makes us so interesting.

From Scott Pilgrim

A Few Pro Tips
Vegetarians don't eat fish. If you call yourself vegetarian and you eat fish, you're a pescetarian, not a vegetarian. This is one of those little things that bug the hell out of a lot of people.

It's never funny to tease people about their beliefs.

Not all vegetarians and vegans are crazy hippies, the majority are normal. But it's always the weird ones who shout loudest.

The point of all this?

 Being vegetarian isn't hard, but it does take some effort and it's fantastic that you've decided to be vegetarian, but don't be an ass about it. Simple really.

If you have any questions then feel free to hit up the comment box or my email!

Are you vegetarian? What are the best and worst aspects of being vegetarian? If you're not vegetarian, have you ever tried it?

Thursday Thought: Research

I'm in the process of rewriting and editing my novel for the fourth or fifth time? I'm not really sure, I've lost count. The difference this time is that it's because an agent is interested in my novel, before it's always been for university tutors, markers or workshops. So, I'm also going back and re-doing research to make sure that my setting feels authentic. So that readers aren't going to turn to me and ask "how" or "why" questions, or, even worse, turn around and say "that wouldn't work" or "that would never happen". I'm also changing my setting somewhat so that requires some new research.

But how important is research? Writers will tell you all sorts of things because it largely depends on what you're writing. My story relies heavily on research because of the plot and setting, but other stories might not. It also depends on whether it's a fantasy setting, therefore you can make up large chunks as long as it makes sense, or if you've really been there. If it's semi-autobiographical (or entirely autobiographical) then you've probably done a lot of the research without even realising and simply know it.

Some people hate research. Personally I love it. Sure it can be confusing and time consuming but I just love learning about things so I find it fun. But I'd still rather be writing. 

The biggest issue with research, I think, is that you don't actually use a lot of it but you still need to know it. It can be disheartening but you still don't want to cram in all that information, you need to know it so you can construct a believable world, characters and plot but you don't need to tell the reader everything, that would just be boring.

I'm torn when it comes to first-hand research. While I think it's always fantastic to be able to actually go somewhere and experience the place, or to actually do something your character does, it's not possible for everyone. I can't afford to go jetting off around the world. I also don't want to skin a rabbit, even though my character does. So instead I have to rely on reading about it, watching videos or talking to people. Then it's just down to how well you can write about it. But if you can go somewhere, then do. There's nothing like really being somewhere and experiencing it first-hand.

Mistakes will happen. You can't research everything. If you did then you would never actually write anything. So don't beat yourself up about it, hopefully someone will point it out before it goes to print so you can fix it. If not then you'll just have to deal with it. Also remember that you can't please everyone, there will always be someone who finds a flaw in your writing and points it out, don't let it get to you. Lucy Christopher refers to the camel in Stolen as having hooves and she's had lots of people tell her that they have toes, which she is aware of. How does she react? She doesn't really, at the most she agrees with them because camels do have toes. If she wanted to be pedantic she could point out that camels are 'cloven-hoofed' animals. But she doesn't. Which is really the best way to deal with it. It's always better to keep your dignity.

When it comes to research you need to do your best. You shouldn't try to cover up holes though and use short-cuts, that's just lazy and readers will notice. So do your research, do it carefully and do it well. But make sure that you actually write something as well and put that research to good use! 

I think the best novels do not give the impression that the writer did any research at all, you shouldn't be able to tell, you should simply believe in the words on the page.

Now, get back to work!

As usual all the images are from weheartit.com

Feature Friday: Video Games Are More Creative Than Reading

"Video games are more creative than reading" [source]

Katamari Damacy is definitely creative!

Or at least so say award-winning playwright Lucy Prebble and this has caused more than a few people to be aghast by such a notion. But why? Prebble believes that video games are more creative because you are more involved in them than you are with books or watching films. She also believes that gaming is an artform, just like theatre.

I can understand that view because in some ways you are passive when reading because you're not controlling the characters or the stories whereas with games you are, some more than others. However at the same time when you are reading you have to imagine the world and characters, whereas with games that is all done for you. One thing they both have in common is that you need to remember what's happened before you paused or put the book down so that you can continue onwards and you also have to invest in the story and characters so that you can get something out of it.

I've heard some people claim that books are obviously better because you get an emotional response from them, where as you don't with games. That's just silly. I can think of more games that have made me laugh than books. I can also think of more films that have made me cry than books. But that doesn't make one better than the other. I still love books because they are a solitary thing whereas games and films are more of a shared experience.

Lucy Prebble from: The Guardian

I doubt that Prebble meant to upset anyone with her comments. She's a writer herself so she obviously loves the written word, but she also loves games and there is nothing wrong with that.

I do agree with one comment she made. I do think that a lot of parents fear that if their kids get into video games then they'll become pasty little fatties who grunt very so often when they want more crisps or coke and only talk online to their fellow gamers. But seriously, that's just ridiculous and if you're even a semi-decent parent you don't have anything to fear. Just tell them to turn it off and shove them out the front door every so often to go play in the park. It's not like reading a book can make you lose weight either, you're still sitting around and not talking to anyone, yet we would rather our kids read.

You can have both. I adore books and I adore video games too. We own all the current generation consoles as well as a lot of older and retro consoles too. We have hundreds of games. I watch TV a lot, films a lot and play a game for a few hours every day or so. But I also read every night before I go to bed. I also go outside and I'm certainly not a pasty little fatty...although I am pretty pale.

This is one of those cases where you really can have it all. Games are fun and creative outlets and they can be social too, books are fun and creative, films are fun and creative. At the end of the day it's about how you use these things. If you're just staring blankly at the screen and going through the motions like a robot then no, it's not good. But the same can happen if you're reading a really boring book, you won't take anything in.

I love that Prebble has such positive things to say about video games, we need more people to stand up and reassure parents that their kids will be fine if they play games, as long as they're still good parents. My only issue is that by saying such a thing you are potentially pushing kids away from books and that's not a good thing. We all need to read more, stories are a huge part of our culture and history, there are so many ways to experience them so why not try and find as many ways to do that as possible? 

The Great Gatsby, also a NES game!

ENJOY ALL THE STORIES!

Thursday Thought: Where I Get Ideas From

Image from: Saricientta

I thought I would talk about about where I get ideas from, because it's something that people always seem to be interested in.

It's hard to pinpoint where you get ideas from so I had a look around me and thought about what I do each day. Essentially I surround myself with creative things and spend a lot of time absorbed in stories. I probably watch about two or three films a week. I watch a fair bit of TV. I read three of four books a month. I read webcomics everyday. I read print comics every month or so. I love to spend time online looking at art and photography, I also save a lot of pictures if I find them particularly interesting. I play video games quite a lot too. My point is, most of my interests and the things I spend my time doing involve stories in one way or another and thus can be inspiring. I love watching Skins, which isn't for everyone but it's good to see how stories develop, how characters interact, to see a plot unfold, to see something that is different to your own work. It can still be influential in ways you wouldn't think.

Ghost in the Shell pushed me to take one of my stories in a different direction and the game Jet Set Radio Future inspired other aspects of it. A nature programme about a man who had an incredibly close relationship with wild bears inspired another of my stories as did the snow during the winter of 2010.

I know people who's stories were inspired by a photograph. People who were inspired by their own experiences or by the stories of people they've met. People who were inspired by other books that they thought were awful so decided to show that they could write something better. People who are inspired by their favourite authors because they want to be just as good as them. People who are inspired by music. All sorts of things can inspire and influence you. 

Image from: Adihrespati

Ideas are everywhere.

I get my ideas from all over the place. So this post has probably been entirely unhelpful. I think that ideas are easy, it's everything else involved in writing that is hard. Creating a believable world inhabited by believable characters is incredibly hard. Creating a story that works, makes sense and is interesting is incredibly hard. The ideas are not so hard. You get ideas by daydreaming. By experiencing other stories both real and made-up. Most of my stories start out as "what if" wonderings.

I think it's incredibly important that as a creative person you have time and space to just think about things. To daydream. To stare out of the window uninterrupted and mull things over. I think it's important to surround yourself with creative and inspiring things and people. Don't let the real world drag you down. Don't let yourself become boring and mundane. Stay creative. Otherwise how can an idea grow into something wonderful if you're not taking proper care of your headspace? Also, write them down even if you think they're stupid or of no use to you now. They might be later on.

So, where do I get my ideas? As Neil Gaiman said "I make them up. Out of my head."